Thoughts

There are not many post this few weeks.. I do not know what to post..
Ok.. Gabriel coming back tomorrow... So fast it has been a year.. Many things happen in this year.. Really unexpected that I am still here, with the youth. I taught that when gab went to aus a year before, it will be the last time to meet him. But now, I m still here, holding on, trying so hard to live and in just a zap of time he is back. I still remember before he went to aus, I was having some problems that could not solve. Now he coming back, and still, the problem is there; bigger, with more complicated...

Ok.. I'm going to fast something.. PS... not going to play it for 4o days? Er.. Hope can lar...
Currently watching the X-Family. Starring Jiro! So cute!! Chun is in too but not coming out so fast.. Its a funny show.. However, yesterday when I watch this show, I was crying. Sweat right? Ya! I was crying. My tears.. Roll down. There are some parts really make me cry. But yesterday I know that its not the show. Its myself. I was down the whole day yesterday after church. Really down. I came back with full of thoughts. I was thinking of someone that in the church going to do something already. My friend, Wilson, too doing something. All of them trying so hard to achieve their goals in their life. But, I am still here listening to people giving instruction. They ask me to go for study, then I listened. Now, There's no news anymore. That's mean no more. I also followed. Can I really do what I want? I don't think so. That's why yesterday when I watch the show I was crying. i was seeing the cast, the people, they can do what they really wants. But Sherina still hanging there doing the same routine that she dislike. She has no choice but to obey. She listened and followed. This is what she can do. I want to do something that is different. Something that I like. something that I am happy when I am doing it. Will there be any possibility? What I can do now is pray to our Lord, Jesus. TO show me a way~
Yesterday night, while I am still in a down mood, I listened to some songs and tidy my stuff. Feel a bit relaxing. After that I went to take a bath. Then I done some writings in 'knowing Christ'. Then I sleep.
Today, I might be in the same situation but I am sure that the Lord is doing some miracle things around me that I can't see but I will soon see it.