I m A MURDERER!

I'm so fed up with myself.. I do not know why those feeling come back again.
Especially when she did something and i feel that its so wrong.
I hate what she had done. I should not hate her. But i still hate her.
WHY?
I should understands her feeling?
Oh PLEASE!
U should understand me!! I'm so tired.. Can i just give up for everything??
Please don't make me hate you.
Don't like that again. Pls don't do it again.