I learned a lesson in my dream yesterday.
I know it is a important lesson but yet, I forgotten what I dreamed. =.=
I learned another one this morning. That is - Yesterday is yesterday. Today is today. Whatever happens yesterday will not happen again if I changed. If I do not want history repeats by itself then I got to make sure TODAY is TODAY. If I wake up with a heavy heart, it will spoilt my entire day. However if I wake up with full of JOY, I know my day starts with JOY.
Yea, yesterday both of me and my "friend" was pissed off with something. and the entire night I was filled with all stupid thoughts. I am angry, sad, and so on. I know that that friend of mine who was pissed off felt the same. However, another "friend" of mine sms me and says " We should think rationally and not emotionally. If we want the rest to grow we should grow too. If not, I will go nowhere." Yea, I agree with him. I always decide things emotionally that's why all the lead me to nowhere. I haven't grow and I'm still hiding in a shell.
Another "friend" of mine wrote me a verse before - Be full of JOY in the Lord.
I always read it but I never do it.
I try to do it but I never use my heart to feel it
When I use my heart to feel it, it is because I'm too far away from the right path. Silly I am right?
I saw a post from my friend blog. She titled it as pity person. I feel the post related to me. (I don't mean she writing bout me but I, myself, feel I am related to that post.)
I feel that I am a person who always thinks I am right and never think of the people around me. I feel that I am a selfish person. I do things emotionally and don't care what people says. I am such a person. and, I always says that I want to change but I just SAY it. So how to change if I say it and never meant it?
I always complained about things happened to me. I always felt that why everything must be me? Why I need to go through several things when I am just 15 years old? 17 years old? 18 years old? I complained - always. Last two weeks sermon, Ps. Richard tells us one thing with a song. "Count your blessing one by one"
And now, I saw the verse my friend gave me - I will always trust in you and in your mercy shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord because he has BLESSED ME SO RICHLY - Psalm 13:5-6.
Yea, I was blessed by the LORD with lots of things. I should count it one by one. and, I know itis uncountable because it is too many. The Lord has bless me with a bunch of youth, friend, family, people who care bout me, things that I'm having, place that I stayed and so on and on.
So why am I complaining. I should stop complaining and see the problem with a different way.
If there's no problem in my life. Then, is this called life? If there's no problem in my life, then how am I going to grow.
Everything happened with a reason. God plan is always GREATER than ours.
Now, I might lost all the people who care for me, those who always talk to me, who always give me advises, those who teach me things, everything and anything, I know that GOD never leave me. I always put God in the end of my list. I never put God first. I admit! I am so terrible. I always asked Him things only when I need him. But now, I need to know what is the most IMPORTANT thing in my life.
Seek ye first the kingdom of God
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
If you love me, you will obey what I command.
What I post here today is not for people to see. It is for me to remember that I need to grow. RATIONALLY. Sherina, never tell people how emo are you, or how sad are you. YOU are not allowed to think negatively always. Be full of JOY in the Lord! =)
6.10.2009 - a date for me to remember. =)